Real Teen Problems | Relationships | Drugs | Alcohol | Sex | Mental Disorders and More!Helping real teens with their problems!

Alright, many of you have probably already read a few of my posts about a guy that I’ve liked that moved and everything… Well there’s more to it now. Not just the fact that were hanging out again a lot and becoming good friends all over again… But there are other people.

I’m so sorry this is so long!
But please, any advice?

This has to be the first time I personally have read about any of your problems so I may not know all of the details but from what I have read so far your ex isn’t worth your time.

You are young your 15, that means your ex and you started dating at what 12? Which is perfectly fine I believe love is love and no matter what age. I just think she played with your head a bit too much. To be engaged to someone is a big deal and from the sounds of things she pushed it a bit too hard.

She also cheated on you… which I have little room to talk because I am guilty of doing this in the past as well but it’s wrong. She shouldn’t have done that, I disagree with the statement once a cheater always a cheater but it takes a lot to get past that point. From the sounds of things she hasn’t gotten past that point.

Now the guy you meet you should watch your self. You really don’t want him to do the same thing that your ex did to you. If you two keep talking and it’s progressing bring up the fact that he should get rid of his girlfriend because you don’t want him to be cheating on her. Long distance relationships CAN work they are just very difficult now a days. It takes a lot of mutual trust but it can be done.

But from the sounds of things you guys have a lot in common I prefer long distance at first because you get to know the real selves. You get to see them when they are laid back and not trying to impress others. It’s very helpful at least that’s my personal view.

In closer I think you shouldn’t even consider taking back your ex unless she proves that she’s not joking about wanting you back and she won’t dare think about cheating again.

I think you and the guy should keep talking just be careful of what talking becomes if it crosses any lines you need to have him end things with his girlfriend, of course that being said if he’s willing.

Good luck with your Teen Problem, hope my advice helped a little bit!

- John
- Real Teen Problems!

Ok so I have basically non-existant relationship experience but I think I may have feelings for my best friend?…we’re both about to head off to college and I feel like I’m running out of time to do something about my feelings. Should I say something to him or hope my feelings pass?

This is a tough one, this can either go your way or completely back fire in your face. This basically comes down to how badly do you think you’ll regret not telling him. Is it worth the risk that It patiently could make your guy’s friendship awaked.

If you think it’s worth the risk and you really need to know go with him and sit him down and tell him. Explain it out, he will respect you for telling him and you never know he may just feel the same way about you. I mean he’s your best friend so you can’t ask for a better boyfriend, I know from my girlfriend and I.

Heads up though collage can tear up some of the most dedicated couples apart. I know people who have dated for 2 or 3 years and being away at different collages split them apart.

That being said every couple is different. If you think you will regret not telling him I recommend telling him.

- John
- Real Teen Problems

So, I’ve been sleeping with this guy for about 6 or 7 months, as a friend with benefit type of thing.

What would you do?

Honestly if you like him and your sleeping with him as it is how much are you truly risking by dating him and giving him a chance. I know people always say once a cheater always a cheater, I disagree. If that was true I wouldn’t be dating my girlfriend of 1 year. As will as many happily married couples.

We all make our fair share of mistakes but from the sounds of things he’s been trying to prove he wants to be faithful. He needs to just know that he is on thin ice and that if he messes up the slightest it’s over.
If you like him and you don’t try it you may just kick your self forever. Dating anyone is a risk, it’s something we all have to do if we want a successful relationship though.

Good luck with your Teen Problem, hope my advice helps a little bit!

- John
- Real Teen Problems!

Okay during the summer I do this summer school program. It’s not anything school related we just go out and do things like go swimming or go horseback ridding and stuff like that. And it’s somewhat like a private school it’s just a smaller class lets say and its 1-12 graders threes and telemetry room and middle school room and a high school room. So this year I am going into 9th grade which is the high school. So today I was at summer school and the class and 3 teachers were playing a game and I caught my teacher Mr.B staring at my boobs. Which before I even went to the high school I had like a best friend Kirstin in the high school. And she told me Mr.B was a perv and he stares at girls and looks down their shirts. I kind of believed her and kind of didn’t so when I got to summer school the first day with the high school I asked this girl named Mariah in my class if she thought Mr.B was a perv she said yes. So while we were playing a game I was writing some notes to Mariah and she wrote back… Later all the students which is only 4 split up into different rooms and write out some plan since some of us weren’t getting along well… I had brought the notebook me and Mariah were writing in which we have been writing in for the past few weeks now and its some dirty talk and everything and by the way I Mariah is my gf well after I got done writing the plan I saw Mr.B opening my journal that we were writing in and he was reading it then he ripped out two pages that we were writing on he didn’t even ask to look in it or touch it then he said I don’t want you and Mariah to be passing notes anymore and I was like okay… and he took those two papers and took off with them so that’s when I ripped up all the other ones and threw them away since I don’t want him to be reading them so I was wondering what would u have done in that situation I tried to talk to one of the other teachers but they really didn’t seam to care but by Mr.B doing that without asking made me feel weird and Idk how but just weird like mixed emotions and so we leave to go for a walk and I ask this kid named David in my class if he thought Mr.B was a perv he was like ya… So I was wondering what some of ur peoples thoughts were do you think I should talk to my councilor and also I have seen Mr.B staring at the girls and he’s always following me and Mariah so ya I just don’t know what to do I kind of feel like I don’t want to go back their because of him.

Well technically he being a teacher does have the right to intercept your notes. Now reading those notes can be border line wrong. People have fought this before due to so called invasion of privacy. Now if he just walked over and picked up your note book with out even asking that would be classified as wrong.

If you are scared of him sit down with your school councilor and voice your concerns. If other female students feel uncomfortable with the way he acts and looks at them talk to them and have them come up. Students should feel comfortable with their learning environment.

But best advice is if you don’t want your teacher to see get rid of the evidence. Once the person got the note have them cross it out so anyone else cant read it. Or if you want to be really tricky create a code that only you and your girlfriend know.

I hope you can find a way to deal with your fear of him. But technically unless he touches, says something or does anything that can be classified illegal there is little you can do.

I listen to the old songs that him and i used to listen too, or think about how my life would be right now. i wonder what to do. i’m not going to describe my situation, considering i have a few times before. i know a lot of people go through break ups and heartaches, but it’s been almost 8 months and i still miss him like the day he moved out.

i’m really tired of missing him. i just want to be over him or with him, not in between.

Sadly humans tend to remember things that stick in out minds. When you hear one of those songs you don’t think of all the times you heard it while you were just sitting in the car.  You think about the best or the worst way depending on the song. Recommend if it really is causing that much of an issues to try and avoid these songs.

From the sounds of things your former boyfriend doesn’t know what to do. He’s confused, and not sure what to do. It sounds like he is regretting walking out on you and from what I read your daughter. If your getting tired of waiting ask him what he wants once and for all.

If he is going to play wishy washy and not make a decision I’d recommend stopping communication with him. Has he came out and sad he hates you? Or are you just assuming that since he hasn’t replied to your text messages?

Again best advice is confront him and make him make a decision. But be fair and give him time to sit down and think it through even if he gives you answer right away make him wait at least 24 hours and sort his thoughts and see if he still has the same choice.

Keep me updated on what happens if that’s possible!

Thanks

- John
- Real Teen Problems!

There’s this guy from my youth group…

We both went on the trip to Toronto last week, and we spent a lot of time together!

Before the trip, we barely knew each other…We had talked a couple of times, but really only because we were friends with some of the same people (I’m friends with one of his best friends, and one of my best friends is also friends with him).

But now…We know each other, and I feel like there’s a definite connection.

During the trip, we spent at least 4 hours a day together working in a soup kitchen. There were basically never more than 11 people in the kitchen at a time, and 4 of those people were usually people we didn’t know and so us as a youth group tended to stick together a lot.

Even when we weren’t in the soup kitchen and we were with our whole group (in the morning our youth group was split up between 2 soup kitchens) we would talk a lot, and walk together with his arm around my waist. And, I have a bad ankle, and he was really great about letting me lean on him when it hurt and stuff like that.

We also found a common bond with what we learnt from the week. All of the youth groups got together one night for worship and sharing reflections on the week so far, and we both shared similar stories. After that, we talked about that sort of stuff.

Yesterday, I texted him and we talked for 2 hours about everything…Our day, the trip, our friends, and how we should hang out sometime this week if we can, or, next week seeing a movie with some mutual friends (and when he said that, he said that I would make the party that much better )

So anyway…

I really, really like him, and on the trip it seemed like he felt the same way, and he’s still being great AFTER the trip. I don’t know what to do though!

I’ve never liked a guy like this before, and I’ve never really thought that the guy I liked, liked me back. (There was only once that this ever happened, but it wasn’t the same because we barely knew each other).

Should I say something?
Should I just try and get to know him better?
Should I wait for him to say something?

Basically, I’m just lost.

First of all I am sure the work done by you and your churches youth group was appreciated very much by anyone who relays on the soup kitchen for a meal. If only more people took time out of their lives to help others.

Anyways back to your problem, you to are on a great starting point. From the sounds of things you both have some very common ground. If you and he both agree there is a connection and it’s worth while to follow that connection than by all means do so.

If you asked me from what you posted about he is interested in you, give him the chance to get to know you more. So take him up on any offers he throws out to spend time with you. I can’t tell you what to do exactly but you should do what you think feels right. You can say something to jump start something or you can wait while you both get to know each other more and he makes the first move.

It’s all up to you, but like I said do what feels right. Normally you gut instinct is right about this type of thing.

A side; if you both have mutual friends be careful, they may not see it as the group of friends but the group of friends plus the girlfriend and boyfriend. Just try and keep things as normal around your friends.

I am looking forward to hear how this one turns out. I will be checking in, in a few weeks to see how it turns out.

- John
- Real Teen Problems

Alright, I had an internet girlfriend that I met on the forum. Things were going great, we talked on the forum, then we talked on AIM, we exchanged phone numbers, and we were planning to meet in real life.

Well, I was bored and I was on another teen forum. They had a picture rating thread, so I thought to myself “Why not?” and posted a picture of myself. Well there was this one girl who said “8/10 cute . Got AIM?”. I didn’t think anything bad could happen, so I talked to her. Except the conversations between aim, started to get hot and heavy. Pretty soon she sent me a picture of her in her underwear.

I don’t know how to deal with this TS. I mean I want to meet my current GF in real life, but whenever I think about her. The other girl from the other forum comes up. How do you think I should deal with this.

Well online relationships tend to be a bit interesting. They can and are normally very difficult to maintain. The correct thing to do is spill, it sound’s like you feel guilty. Tell your existing girlfriend what happened, and explain how it was innocent and wasn’t meant to happen. That being said she will likely be upset, when your dating someone online it takes a lot of trust. You need to make her believe in you, and believe that she is who you want and not the other girl.

Though once you spilled and whenever you think of your girlfriend and that girl other still comes to your mind you may want to sit down and think long and hard about who and what you want in a relationship. Your existing girlfriend may not be what you really want.

Best advice is to admit your flaws, if she really loves you and or is interested in keeping your relationship strong she will be glad that you admitted your flaws. It’s best not to keep things hidden from her, she will respect your honesty as will as your drive to try and keep things together.

If she doesn’t forgive you and attempt to keep things strong don’t worry that’s her choice, and it wasn’t meant to be. The best thing to do is try and do everything you can, if not you may end up regretting it forever.

Another idea, it may help to block the other girl. It will help keep the temptations away.

- John
- Real Teen Problems